Dear Publix: Get A Secret Entrance

Dear Publix,

I love you. I love your subs and your friendly customer service and your clean store. I love your prices and that you give Dawson a balloon when he asks. I love your cookies and your Buy One Get One Bins. However, as a loyal customer, I must ask, no, beg, something of you.

Get a secret entrance. This proposed secret entrance would be for moms with with a toddler and diaper bag in tow, running in to get something real quick. Wipes, milk, Barney toothpaste, whatever. The purpose of this entrance would be to avoid the toddler seeing the army tanks (cleverly disguised as race car shopping carts) at the regular front entrance.

Kids LOVE the dang things. They love to pretend like they're driving, I'm sure they like that it faces out instead of staring right at mom the whole time. It's fun for them, and if I'm being honest, probably takes the whining time in the store down from 5 minutes to 4.5.

But these carts are MONSTERS. They do not turn easily, they are nearly impossible to get by one of those crafty right-in- the- middle- of-the- store stands, (usually featuring something glass and breakable) and squeezing by someone in an aisle? Forget it. Unless it is the baby aisle, then it is a traffic tram of moms pushing semi trucks with the look of "why the heck do they HAVE these?!" on their faces.

I don't like to lie to my kid, so I am overwhelmed with joy when the "big carts" are "all gone" or they've been left out in the sun and are too hot, or if I can find a microscopic drop of water on it and explain that it is "all wet." I admit I have resorted to the "Hey! Look over there!" as I dash through the front of Publix and bypass the carts, hoping to find a lonely cart somewhere in the store. All to avoid the task that is maneuvering these giant green carts.

This secret entrance could be stocked with regular carts, making it easy for moms to plop their toddler in a normal, human sized shopping cart and run in to get what they need quickly and easily. They could do so without needing a GPS and dashboard camera to get from the bakery (free cookie) to the register (ba-woon please. Wed please)

On days when moms had enough patience (ha) and time (hahahah) and a lot of shopping to do, they could venture into the regular entrance and treat their kids to a ride in the ginormous shopping carts.

Or they could just say no every time to those sweet, big, wide eyes asking so nicely to please try "that cart, mommy!"

A secret entrance would allow moms to get in and out without having to first scour the parking lot to make sure there were no race car carts anywhere in the toddler's line of vision, and then move like a Jedi into the store using every distraction technique they've ever used. It would create happy moms in Publix, and the world needs more of that.

Thank you in advance for your cooperation with this. I look forward to the new construction of the secret entrance at a Publix near me.

Diana