We woke up late yesterday, which threw our whole day off so he didn't get his nap yesterday. Today we woke up at 8:00, went to the doctor, came home, played, and went to the park. At 1:45 we came home, I nursed him and put him in his crib at 2:05. He cried until 2:45 and I couldn't take it anymore. The cries seemed worse than Monday. I went up there and his face was all red and there were tears running down his face. I picked him up and he clung to me so tight, and kept crying. It took him a good 5-10 minutes to calm down, and it took everything in me not to cry.
I hate this.
So I brought him downstairs, nursed him, and he fell right asleep in my arms. I know he's tired! I took him back upstairs and put him down at 3:07. It's 3:28 and it doesn't sound like he's calming down.
I hate this. I feel like i'm doing it all wrong. I feel like I'm not doing the right steps or doing it for the right amount of time. I feel like a failure when I go and get him, but I feel like a bad mom when I sit there and let him scream all by himself.
And I really really just want to call my mom.
I hate this.
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