Impatient

When I first found out I was pregnant, I spent so much time hoping for "signs" to convince myself that this was really happening. I found myself practically wishing for morning sickness.  When the time came, feeling like I was about to hurl  every morning was not fun, and I looked forward to my second trimester when things would get better. As the nausea subsided, I found myself wishing I was bigger, that I'd actually start to "look" pregnant. Now that I feel big and tied and cranky, and as I struggle to get comfortable in bed, or walk short distances, I find myself hoping for contractions to start. Almost wishing for what other women describe as the worst pain of their lives.

The morning sickness came and went. I began to look pregnant, and, in time, contractions WILL start and I WILL have this little baby. All of that beginning stuff felt like it went by so quickly, and I know when I hold that little boy in my arms I will forget about how "long" I waited and how impatient I was. Sometimes though, in the moment, it's hard to remember that stuff. I know I will look back and miss the rolling and kicking in my belly that only I can feel. I will wish I spent more time enjoying being pregnant and less time wishing the next phase would start. I need to remember to enjoy each day and moment, because, just like the morning sickness and the growing belly, it'll happen and be over, before I know it. 

But really Dawson, you can come any day ;)